She is the most beautiful woman in the world…both inside and out.

When I first met her I was an American working in Shanghai and the first time I saw her I thought if I were to ever take a Chinese wife back home it would be her. I held that view all the time while I was in China but still managed to hurt her deeply because of my actions with other woman I had met. Yet, perhaps it was her actions and reactions to these events that showed me her deep love and understanding for a fool such as I. I had always loved her, I realized, in the end, a fool can’t be a fool all the time so I married her.

Her life hasn’t been easy and I sense that much of her maturity and strength come from the early time in her life. With no much money she traveled to many places in this world. Some of the things I recall from her are her buying breakfast for a little Tibetan girl, and then later buying a pilgrim who had walked hundreds of kilometers to Lhasa a white scarf so she could make an offering to the Buddha as is the custom. Then there was the time she visited Thailand and adventured into one of those brothel bars, such is her curiosity, and spoke to the poor souls of woman who were just trying to survive. There was no discrimination of these women by my wife, only the sadness in the way these woman had to live their lives. Such is her respect. Then there are the pictures of those poor African kids who have the flies in their eyes. And then there is my wife refusing to eat the meat of a beautiful antelope whom she had seen alive a few hours before. Such is life in her eyes. Then to write her story and have it published in China about such things … wow.

So how about our relationship??? I think the story that says it best about her is the day I was cleaning our home, vacuuming (yes I do such things) and she had left an ink pen and books on the floor by her bed. Instead of picking up the books I pushed the books and pen out of the way with the end of the vacuum. Unfortunately the pen got trapped under the powered rotating roller and broke the pen. In seconds there were several 6” wide bands of black ink about 12” long in the gray carpet. I ran to the basement to get our carpet cleaner and my wife asked, ”What’s up”. She followed me upstairs and I explained to her what I had done. She looked at me straight in the eyes and said… “I’m so sorry for leaving the pen there and now causing you so much work!”

I can tell you most women would value the carpet more than my sweat. This is the way my wife is. She almost always takes responsibility for such misfortunes that are not her responsibility to take. An honest man, such as I think I am, would never let her take responsibility for things that are not hers to take. It makes the marriage work for us. My wife would say this is a small thing.

So what is the big thing in my wife’s life???? FAMILY! There are no greater wants than this. This is the thing that counts. The greatest thing that has entered her life, is our little girl, Jade, now 3 years old. My wife is one with Jade. There is no other way to describe this. It is a mother’s connection and deep love for her little one. As for me the greatest thing that has happened to me, the really true happiness, is to see the pure joy and love on my wife’s face when she is with Jade. I know my wife never knew, I never knew, such feelings were there.

Last but no least she hates the war, and she hates the waste. She's a recycler. She loves boots. And I love her. True story.

妻子点注：关于吃鹿肉的事，我解释一下。 我在非洲的时候和当地的bushmen去打猎， 亲眼看他们杀死了一头漂亮的鹿。他们当时生起火烤了现割下来的鹿肉， 我一口也没碰， 而是躲在一边哗哗流泪。 大概是我生性敏感， 看不得一个活生生的生命在转瞬间消失。 但对bushmen 来说那是个值得庆贺的幸运日，因为整个村落将有好几天的食物。

在此文中他提到了在婚前我们的一点风波。 不过我想说的是他并不是个道德败坏的人。 当时我们千里相隔， 我在澳洲他在上海，而就近有个女的对他追求甚紧， 他坚持不住就和她出去了几趟。 但后来他对我坦诚交待， 我们一起经历了困难时期和许多上上下下， 但我们的关系却因经历这些距离时间的考验而变得更牢固。我一直对他有敢于坦诚的勇气而尊敬他， 他一直因为我努力去理解并原谅他而感激我。